The day in a life of a Goddess - Fiction.. well, sorta.

The day in the life of a Goddess, not a small thing, and I've been known to be one of the less active deities.

So, anyways, here I was, dreaming of sweet little angels and hot demi-gods, when this annoying little sound penetrates my subconscious. Who would dare to disturb the rest of a Goddess? I mean really.. didn't they know I could earth quake their ass into the next continent? Prying my eyes open, I turned to realize my soothing, birds chirping in the morning alarm clock, had been switched by a mechanism from hades itself. The thing whined and chirped even as I threw atleast three good god-bolts at it. Finally, laying broken on it's side, it decided to give up the battle. Alas, though, the damage had been done.

I was up.

Pulling myself up, I found my silken cloud sheets had twisted about my feet, dissipitating into an ugly mess of snakes and gorgons that fell in a heap at the foot of my bed. Groggily, I blinked my eyes, trying to center myself.

Ugh, Phobo's hadn't even crested the horizon yet, what was I doing up so early? Bleerily I scouted for my clothes, bypassing the food stained toga's for a clean pair of jeans and t-shirt. This would have to do, I told myself, stumbling into the bathroom before the demi-gods of the Temple awoke.

As I looked into the mirror, scented water ran into the basin of my sink, and my eyes befell the glorious perfection that was my hair.

Crap.

You never see Aphrodite having bad hair days, so why was it I was stuck for a good fifteen minutes just brushing? Maybe I should cut it off, I mused, checking my teeth before a sound caught my attention.

Like the hounds of hades, the pitter patter crescendo'd through out the Temple halls, walls shook with the magnitude of what passed, and old single woman clutched their toy-poodles tightly to their chest in fear. Yes, I smiled with pride, for everywhere I was, people were reminded of the powerful little minions I wielded with a tight, military style regimen.
Well, that's what they thought atleast. I preferred fiction to liven my day.
Turning, I only had time enough to brace myself as the two demi-gods of destruction entered the Temple's bathroom.

The first born, daughter, twin to my soul. A Demi-Goddess of Destruction in the most covert way. She could destroy your reservations with a single bat of those long lashes, tear down your walls of denial with a few uttered words. Her reign when she reached full God-hood would be memorable.

I would hopefully be retired and living in a God-assisted community by then.

The second born, son, key to my heart. He was Chaos in the most literal sense. Only eighteen months old, and already he had fell major cities (of blocks) and destroyed countless treasures (like my new 42" plasma TV... fried, because of a misplaced cup of apple juice).
They swarmed in and around me, and in a flash of light and sound, I scooped up my beloved goons, fed them the marshmallow goodness that was kid-ambrosia (twice the sugar) and piled them into my Chariot.

Cripes, my Chariot!

I stood before what had once been a great vehicle of heavenly procession. It was to be driven by six road-hungry horses. detail paint along the wheels and hood. What was before me was a travesty of the heavens. Two horses, one sway backed and glassy eyed, stood tethered to the behoumeth that was my chariot. Though it's size was impressive, the wheels spun from being unbalanced, as though to mock me and mine. I could not stand and gape, but pushed my minions into the contraption, sitting for another fifteen minutes as my great steeds stretched and warmed their tired, aging muscles.

We were off!

While Phobos finally crested the hills of our blessed valley, I dropped the minions off at minion-day care. Where all little demi-gods learn to be great citizens of our pantheon.
My work began as it usually did. Performing miracles, fullfilling wishes, damming the unfaithful. Want your bills trimmed down? Sure! Need help with your kids? I'm here to help. Revenge on ye old boyfriend. I'd love to! (Looks at Boss, backtracks) Hmm, maybe I should refer you to my sister.

My followers adored me, worshiped me, threw petals at my feet every time I went to copy a document. Acolytes sang praises and let presents of untold wealth pile at my desk for the remainder of the day. Too bad it all ended at Five.

Tearing myself from the work that defined me, I floated to my chariot, immune now to the splitting paint along the side, or the suspicios key scratch against the inside. Work always left me refreshed, and mobile, and ready to face another day.

(Who was I kidding?)

Picking up my little minions, was another job in itself. You see, at the end of each day, there is a fine dance that Goddess and Minion Daycare workers.

"Your son destroyed another city again, and he keeps making the younger gods sit under neath him. "
"So? " Wasn't he supposed to be learning leadership skills?
"Underneath him, as in, he sits ON them. "
"Oh..."

"Your daughter on the other hand, was wonderful. Honestly Ma'am we don't know how such a sweet little thing could be rela...-- " I watched the worker pause, then rethink.

Somehow the conversation turned back to my son.

Minutes dragged into years, but I stood strong, standing regal in the face of my opposition. In the end, they bowed their heads to the greatness that was I.

"So, as agreed, we'll have councilling sessions next week?"

"Fine.." I grumbled.

Whisking my under-estimated minions back into the Chariot, we flew (sputtered) home. I decided tonight, I would have the messangers delivery our evening ambrosia. After all, it's not like I had to worry about my figure. We goddesses never gain weight! It was a blasphemy to even think of such a thing. Luckily, the Temple had been deserted of followers that evening, leavin moi alone with my rumalations and hell-ment demi's. I wondered, as for the tenth time I put the Ancient Tomes of Romance back onto their shelf, why I destined to a life of mediocrity? Where was the big stuff? Why wasn't I the one throwing thunder bolts? Why wasn't Hephaestus running to my aid to fix my car? What did Aphrodite got that I didn't? And when was Ares going to finally give me back the negligee set he borrowed three nights ago? Did I forget to order ranch sauce with my chicken?

After my deep, chocolate covered soul searching, the minions finally fell into an exhausted sleep, dreaming of destroying worlds and universes, smiles on their perfect little mouths. Me? I fell into the feathered-goodness that was my bed of beds. Phobo's had called it quits hours ago, and my Temple had been attended to by all those hundreds of adoring worshippers. Not a speck out of place, not a book on the floor, or dishes unwashed. The universe was at peace, because, I was at peace. The world sighed.

Ahh
Bliss.

That's when I finally woke up.