Something else that's Funny

INSTALLING HUSBAND 1.0

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
distinct slow down in overall system performance - particularly in the
flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend
5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as
Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable
programs such as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0. and Golf Clubs 4.1.Conversation 8.0 no
longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried
running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?
Signed,
Desperate

Dear Desperate:

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while
Husband 1.0 is an Operating System.

Please enter the command: "http: I Thought You Loved Me.htm" and try to
download Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.

If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then
automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But
remember, over use of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to
default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1.

Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the
background, that will eventually seize control of all your system
resources).

Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are
unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory
and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying
additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Hot
Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck,
Tech Support